One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Does the phrase 'traumatizing near-threesome' mean anything to you.
What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
There are taser marks on me. Your face flashed before my eyes when i woke up and saw them.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
My dad told me to bring weed to easter Sunday dinner..
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
