You also had the stripper slap the shit out of me for not having any money....remember that?
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
One night stand. Woke up at her dad's house. She already left for work. Shit's about to go down.
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
My gynecologist got a full view of the obviously bite marked shaped bruises on my thighs. I just kept talking about work and hoped she wouldn't judge me.
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
He smoked and I was tired so left before we did anything. I literally left him high and dry.
Lol woke up with mangoes in bed with me
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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