this is like her 8th guy since december, is she wasn't frumpy people would call her a whore
this morning he rolled over looked at me and said "oooo, you look like i need a drink" and then put on his clothes and left without another word
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
I just want to let it be known that I almost put my phone in the fridge.
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
1. My arms are cement 2. I wish dogs could answer the phone
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
Apparently nick called me at 3 in the morning looking for you because you ate your keys and ran away..do I need to call an ambulance.
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
if i ever get to the point where i am moaning when i pee, please do the honorable thing and kill me.
You're supposed to discourage my sluttiness not bring me hot Colombian men
Her handjob consisted of slapping me in the balls. I am never hooking up with her ever again ever.
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
