there r dinosaurs outside my house i hear them
pretty sure those are just snow plows....go back to bed
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
I was mid-sentence and you stopped me and said, "Yeah.. for my vaginas sake, I'm gonna need you to stop talking right now."
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
Oooo. Can we pretend to be Amanda Bynes?
She bought wigs like Disney princesses. I want to be her.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
How do you tell a woman that you are seeing that the scars on your back are from her awesome-in-bed little sister?
If you send me one more .gif of that fumble, I will make the 10 hour drive just to set you on fire.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
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