i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
Thats two for two birthdays where I've gotten the "alcoholism runs in the family" speech
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
haha it staarrted out with just getting drunk then it turned into sports authority. So now im 4th or 5th in line and shit faced. Help me
There's two big trays of water in our freezer. I just hope they freeze by Saturday. for the ice luge.
its Wednesday...
they're reeeeeally big trays
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I used to put Bugles on my penis and pretend it was a wizard.
Your niece just basically announced she's a whore on FB so you should feel pretty good about officiating that wedding next month.
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
Did she seriously come back inside just to piss on the kitchen floor?
He got up in the middle of the show and returned with this massive ham shank, then offered me some by asking "wanna suckle on my hog." Should I be offended?
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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