I failed the drunk obstacle course of trying to find my bed... consolation prize... a sore ankle and "disappointed' parents.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
He paid me to blow him while doing a handstand. Does that make me a whore or just a budding gymnast?
This is my first time seeing you since your lesbian experience. SO EXCITED!
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
We did it in the bathroom in Taco Bell. We didn't buy anything before we left, which I thought was rude.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
Randomize
