Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
bitch please you did NOT just unlike my status..
FYI don't ever, ever get a lap dance from a stripper who says " she's having a bad day " at a bachelor party.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
We can do this. We've been drunk at a gay bar, we will not be taken down by a Tuesday.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
the girls would appreciate it if you invited over some drunk, single, straight men with low standards.
im pretty sure i tried to use axe body spray to cover up the strong urine smell coming from my jeans. im also pretty sure that it didnt work.
Randomize
