she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
and I keep making him eat me out and buying me presents, this is paradise. I wish he cheated on me earlier.
EVERY guy that's EVER been in my vagina has texted me tonight for a booty call. Narrow it down to the greatest hits or just work in timeline order?
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
speaking of festive, i made out with a guy in a leaf pile last night. happy fall?
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
