Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
I woke up with a cutting board and a bag of uncooked pasta next to me.
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
How the fuck did we end up at a strip club last night.. We started the night playing bingo at a church
I'm cooling my balls with a beer because I'm too cheap to turn on the AC
I don't have any soul left to be crushed.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
Donated a pint of blood at 6 and pub crawl started at 7. Thank your lucky stars I'm still alive today.
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