Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
wow, i just saw a girl period all over the floor. get my shoes
and then he ordered a "diet and rum" like the most important part of the drink was the diet.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
doing washington apple shots with my mom. sunday afternoons suddenly got so much better.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
just had an awkward elevator run in with that guy you puked on
Explain the King Dong next to my face.
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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