I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
Found a Safeway Deli Sandwich in the shower this morning... Perhaps the 9th beer was unnecessary.
Carry on my wayward bro, there'll be beer when you get low. lay your neon tank to rest, dont you rage no more.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
Nothing is worse than post drunken playoff baseball loss sex
I enjoy it and I rock at it. I wish there were a respectable way to make giving blow jobs a career.
We found you facedown on his couch in a pile of cheerios, with only one shoe on. Dude you said you were staying in last night.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
