check it out our google latitudes are spooning
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Well, there goes the no drunk sex injuries resolution.
Right when he gets off the plane they're going straight to a party where you're only allowed in with a bottle of whisky and they are given bullet proof vests.
She saves ONE person's life while blacked out and now she's positive anything can be done "while fucking hammered"
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
So the revenge porn my ex posted just resulted in a contract with a gay porn company. I'm going to make $8,000 this weekend. That would a breakup checkmate. Are you joining me in the legislative committee hearing tomorrow?
I can't wait to shower all this regret off of me
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Do you know how hard it is to have sex on an air matress while there are people sleeping in the same room?!?!?
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
