Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i like that you affectionately refer to him as "creepy" ever time you talk about him
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
the best sex is "duke just lost" sex.
You were in subway at 3am showing everyone your tan lines
Me. blonde. Sex. Dance floor.
Left and drinking by a bar by myself. Everyone is in pajamas. I'm in a tuxedo. This is my life.
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
I’m sorry I got high and yelled about the patriarchy.
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
Randomize
