Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Non-Jews are for practice
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.
Dude, I had to stop mid fuck. Her cat was swatting at my balls as I did her from behind. I couldve lost something.
They're playing house music in my dentists office again, wtf is wrong with these people. That's not the music you want to get a root canal to
I was at the pharmacy picking up my herpes medication and the pharmacist asked if I had any questions about my medicine, looked at the bottle, and laughed. Insult to injury man.
I'm scared to touch anything in this apartment. Even the ceiling.
The fact that you got a stranger guy to buy you a pizza off tinder makes me feel amazing
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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