I changed my mind about Tim Gunn. I like him now. Mostly because he said someone's dress looks like a gay t-rex. Or something.
i just caught my roommate coming out of the bathroom half naked with a surge protector. he told me he didn't wanna talk about it.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
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I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
we did anal to Party In The USA and he busted to Firefies .. felt like we were fucking in a middle school dance
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
He came into your room last night to tell me he was leaving, when I woke up this morning he was facedown in your hallway. He didn't make it very far.
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Told her my spirit animal was the spread eagle. Now that's my name in her phone.
That which doesn't kill you gives you an excuse to get shitfaced later
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Omg I joined a choir last night...
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