i may or may not have just grinded on your dog thinking it was my boyfriend
Standing in line for a prescreening of Alice in Wonderland - guy just passed out cold in front of us - first drug overdose of the Alice in Wonderland phenomenon witnessed.
Springtime is officially here. I just used pool water to fill up the bong
thanks for brining me home and putting me in my bed. the pillow fort your built around me is also appreciated.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
That's like.....u just dangled a sex carrot in front of me then took it away!
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Binging muscle relaxers because when ur 33 you can no longer SHAKE IT LIKE A POLAROID PICTURE for 2hrs w/o consequences. Fuck you, Age.
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
I forgot to respond before, I was apologizing for confusing sex with secret Santa.
You pee in parking lots....i drive home naked.....thats the american dream i was promised
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
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