are you so shy because you have an std?
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
Hate sex is AWESOME! I faked it, and when she fell asleep i came in her purse.
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
She's singing So Happy Together to her burrito, I want to be on her level.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
my car smells like vomit and bananas. this can't really be my life.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
Potato salad is not cupcake ingredient
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I've peed in two sinks in the past two weeks. No one should be able to say that.
Randomize