Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
She had a little wicker basket of condoms by her bed. Disturbing yet convenient.
I am telling you that nothing wakes you up like stomach acid exiting your nostrils at 10AM
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
don't care how drunk i am. my dick was like "nope, not doing it, you can't make me and i was like oh yes i can"
On a completely unrelated note I think I have carpal tunnel
Again, totally unrelated
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
I'm bathroom at buffalo wild wings
I think incapable of making pants work send help
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Did you mean to say flashlight? Or did your grandpa really give you a fleshlight for your bday?
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
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