She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
it was really awkward, he kept trying to get on the bed with us and we kept having to kick him back on the floor.
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
She said I'm so hungry I could eat a dick and winked at me
I am alternating between eating dry cheerios and mint chocolate chip ice cream with a fork. Please love me because no one else will
I started crying then my dog licked his dick so yeah.. Kind of ruined the moment.
Note to self: trying to grow pubes back = worst decision of 2014 thus far
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
YOU SHOULD HAVE BEEN THE FIRST VISITOR TO CHRISTMASLAND
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Is a coke binge Whole30 approved?
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
What? I'll do just about anything if you give me a sticker.
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