that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
sorry for the blank pocket text. My penis obviously has nothing to say to you.
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
tell your freshman friends. will trade sexual favors for swipes. ive got dinner tomorrow open and lunch on wed
we played dirty jenga the drinking edition... some girl really just broke a rib? how do we even go this hard
Just saw a midget on a motorcycle. Best sight for a hangover ever.
You say you're gonna take rehab seriously... but i keep imagining it as a training montage for you preparing to snort all of columbia.
That actually is really sweet of you
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
He got punched in the face last night? By who? I’ll invite him to our formal. Seriously.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
Randomize
