So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
But then he started to talk about his wedding he wants and I quote " and yes parts will be choreographed"
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
leave me alone I'm becoming one with nature and doing plant things
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
Tomorrow is my bachelor party. If I die tomorrow, please know I graded you a "check" as a sister. "Check-minus" when you got mouthy.
Randomize
