the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
I just heard an old guy ask the chick he was with if she wanted to try ass to mouth...
thanks for that.
is it just me, or are high schoolers getting sexier?
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Just found an unopened tied g of coke on the floor in her room... she thinks the maintenance guy dropped it earlier today. This takes the cake for sketchiest apartment.
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
You know just a typical night. Eating peanut butter off of tablespoons and having sex to our favorite Christmas carols. This is my favorite time of year.
Just keep in mind that she didn't start telling you you had the largest penis she had ever seen until AFTER she found out about your multi-million-dollar trust fund.
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Hypothetically speaking how does one remove a lamp that they hypothetically superglued to the ceiling?
Acetone nail polish remover, and you lied about studying last night didn't you?
Oh definitely.
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
Randomize