Just fell off a train. Bad.
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
this is your 3rd pregnancy scare in 2 years, I think its time for you to re-evaluate the whole 'im a lesbian' thing
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
You started an entire relationship based only on sex and emoticons.
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
Worst drunk idea ever... Me "Cops are looking for two guys, one in a grey shirt one in a blue shirt" jelly "lets take out shirts off they'll never find us" of course I thought it was brilliant
Like my new perfume? It's a combination of Fireball, sex and bad decisions.
And then the night went full on bisexual.
I don't remember that much at all. But I guess I met this guy from New Zealand and his dog, and then I punched someone in the face.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
And my butt misses you like the deserts miss the rain.
Randomize
