my phone is set on vibrate and its tucked up in my left front pocket. call me back 20 times real quick.
I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
I'm eating oreos and watching porn. This is your fault.
you had a panic attack, pissed yourself, and started crying. you never go above the kiddie level of my lil bros schools haunted house ever again.
round 2?
EVER.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Your ability to be a slut in your nightmare astounds me
dude just did a line with screech. dude is fucking creepy
Indeed. Apparently I called my sisters and told them I wouldn't get arrested because it's not a real sword.
I just realized why I have little cuts all over my fingers. There was a broken pint glass in my purse last night.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I need to just embrace dildos and cats and call it a life.
You weren't singing into a microphone in front of an audience. You were screaming into your fist in the check-out aisle in Walmart.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Where do you think black out memories go?
Into the dark abysmal abyss of the deepest, darkest part of your mind. It's obviously the bodies natural defense to protect you from witnessing the shit you do while actually blacked out.
Randomize
