You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
don't pay it forward
I eont pay shit forward. told a stranger to call an abulance and peaced
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
I have bruises all over my legs. Did I hit a car with my bike last night?
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
I was having a dream that I was swimming in a pool filled with melted chocolate but woke up to find I had poured chocolate milk all over my body
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
