my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
If you've never yelled, "fuck you ray Lewis" in front of your 87 year old grandfather you haven't lived
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
i projectile vomited shoeless at 7:30 a.m. in a taco bell parking lot. never again.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
I swear if you help me with this I will eat you out and buy you all the Taco Bell you want.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
Don't EVER mix a flaming shot, with a Jello shot.. As good as it sounds flaming Jello is not a good idea
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