I hate all girls vehemently.
I never want to see another naked old woman again.
Do you think Conan would leave his wife for me?
He had one of those small greek statue penises
We always say that. And then its 4am and someone is screaming at strippers.
hypothetically speaking is slutty or smart to buy plan b before we go on spring break so i dont have to get it in mexico
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Think I pulled my pelvic muscle.
I think I pulled my ashamed of myself muscle.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
I found a door knob in my purse this morning, I hope whoever it belonged to doesn't need it today.
hahahah
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
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