Free body shot off of Sarah. Expires never.
this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
I just offered a homeless man a meal from McDonald's, and he replied "I don't eat McDonald's food". That is the epitome of "begger's can't be choosers."
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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