the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
Dear yesterdays makeup, Thank you for always being there when I stay up late binge drinking on weeknights and am running late to work Friday morning. You're the best.
what did you hear about me?
that you are a very nice girl and a pleasure to be around
that was hard to say and not laugh
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I will also take that commission in the form of weed. Pass that on to the asst. manager.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Yesterday you said I was the best.
No. I said you DID your best. There's a huge difference.
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
cake and sex. what better combination is there.
Randomize
