belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
PS: I just woke up from my shower
I should've been more social I guess. I feel bad not meeting the people who willingly sucked alcohol out of my navel...
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
So last night I turned down multiple drinks because "I didn't want to hold them". It's time reevaluate my decisions
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
He told me that losing me was the biggest mistake of his life. Of course it was. My tits are incredible and I know more about college football than he does.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
