The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
i have my own cum on my nose right now. don't talk to me about "embarrassed".
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
omg. i wish i could describe to you the number of things that were just in my vagina. i feel like i got gangbanged by construction workers.
Donald Trump and I would be so adorably orange together!
Fuck you, I'm yelling at a mountain right now
do you remember your solution to not spill your drinks last night? .. Shots, that way you wouldnt have time to spill them. i love your drunken logic haha
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
Dude I think the cat just licked the coke plate
Should I apologize for the loud sex I had in his living room? Because I'm not going to.
Definitely not.
Randomize
