Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
how hairy? two words: wookie tits
birth control and beer are two of the most beautiful creations ever invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All he did was like my Instagram picture and I'm already planning how to turn down sex with him this weekend...
Does it make me immature that I debated going to this baby shower stoned, or am I normal as shit and everyone our age are having babies too young?
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Sometimes self-care is taking a shot of vodka and moving on.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Randomize