do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
And then a tiny penis fell out of my purse
I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Yeah I hope so. Definately just saw two freshmen in very authentic togas and cotton ball beards. This new class is stepping it up.
Its not christmas eve unless I give him head. I wont take no for an answer
i think i left a case of beer in your dryer
I just shotgunned a beer alone in the bathroom...what do you expect from me
you reached into a lemon drop to pull out a lemon of someone else's drink..
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
Everyone should know the rule that if your dicks touch during a threeway you just make lightsaber noises and move on.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I just projectile vomited into my kitchen sink. Today need to be over already.
We will walk in fields of dick.
You seriously need to stop quoting those songs when i'm with my parents.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize
