you were running down the aisles of wal mart singing 'follow the yellowbrick road'. i'm pretty sure you thought the night shift workers were the munchkins & started crying when they wouldnt help u find the wizard. needless to say u were pretty stoned/wasted
just found out i fit into magnum condums. this is going to be the best weekend ever
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
Then he said something about how from that angle I looked just like his mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I think it was the free bomb shots from the creepy bolivians that sent us over the edge
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't notice because vodka
DRAW HIM A PICTURE OF SOME FUCING AWESOME THING. LIKE A UNICORN OR SOME SHIT. FANTASTIC.
He also reminds me slightly of a pirate which i find strangely attractive
What is your friends name that I hooked up with? ....I think j found his credit card under my bed
I begin to question your sobriety when you both left here shirtless, with beers in one hand and shotguns in the other
Ok, as his sister I didn't tell you this but he's very familiar with pregnancy symptoms. So next time he calls you fat freak him the hell out by asking if your ankles look swollen.
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