Hallmark should totally make "congratulations on getting your period" cards...I feel they would be quite popular.
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
she refused to get out of the dog cage till we sang "be our guest" to her.
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
So the doctor told me that I am starting to showing the early signs of liver cirrhosis. Thank you Jack Daniels for making the first 26 years of my life awesome.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
It was an "I snuck in through the window at 5am with my underwear in my pocket" kind of night.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
I don't give a shit if you judge. This isn't about you or anyone else. This is about me and my chicken tenders.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
Yeah, but having a dick this size has ruined 3 marriages.
I got a 93 percent on my last mid term and I was drunk. Think of the possibilities if i were sober for the one thats tommorrow.
Randomize
