I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
Your sister thinks she pees out of her clit. Did you have Sex Ed or Sunday School growing up?
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
No flights in Europe due to the volcano erupting. God himself is telling me to spend 4.20 in Amsterdam.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
Dude I reek of $2.50 pitchers, $1 off/pack marlboro cigs, and fear.
Fear?
FEAR.
I just peed in a flower pot on the veranda while crying and holding a drink
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Friends don't let friends drunk sleep in the dorm common room
Also, no joke, I think that raccoon hair is still in my eye from last night.
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
Drove by a cop already pulling someone over and toasted him with my bong
It's 4 in the afternoon........
i'm in a very strange mood rn i'm listening to bruno mars??? am i ok????
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
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