we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
yesterday, he said he didn't trust me around his daughter because "if she was wrapped in rolling paper u'd smoke her." yup.
Hangover cure: shower, throw up again, sleep for 4 hours, eat salsa, brush teeth. Good to go.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
that trick or treat candy bucket that we used to collect beer money last night was very helpful when I vomited in it this morning
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I'll wind up on his doorstep with a confused "oh you live here" expression, a feigned ankle injury and a seemingly fortunately placed bottle of tequila. I don't care what it takes: HIS MOUTH WILL BE ON MOUTH.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Apparently she has a 10 week old kid, which would explain the hallway effect I was feeling.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Going on a coke binge the night before your appointment with your therapist (to talk about your sex addiction) is prob not the best idea.
Randomize
