Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
And then he told me he had the vodka, but he was still in line at WIC for the juice.
You are missing out on the best boobs in town right now
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Who is this?
You offered to lift up your dress at the bar so I could see your lower back tattoo
Um, I think that was a general offer to everyone. So...who IS this?
She's trying to figure out what kind of dinosaur I am... Yay codeine.
fact: I now appreciate my drunken winter self even more. I just found $20 in my winter coat with a note that says keep yourself warm next winter. I am awesome.
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
I got pushed into some bald man in the pit and spent the next few minutes with my face against his head. Man I love ecstasy.
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I felt like I was having sex with Joffrey from Game of Thrones. Needless to say how bad it was
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
You know you've made it in life when the people in the next stall are cheering on your orgasm
Randomize
