Why does Corona taste like a burp?
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
shes a baton twirler.. i expected her to be better with her hands.
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
It's been two weeks and I still have carpet burns on my knees. Well done.
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
I want a coyote to ride back and forth to the bathroom because walking is getting old
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
Whats spookier? Halloween or waking up to a drunk text from your ex telling you how awesome you are at 2am
Randomize
