she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
maybe if i keep dancing i won't throw up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
Some guy just yelled at me from his car "CLIIIIIIIIIITT"... I feel like this has something to do with last night....
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I just sent him 3 long ass texts about how to tell a girl how he feels. I should get a fucking friend zone medal.
I will make you one.
Good. It needs "forever alone" engraved on it
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
And with the bitter taste of failure in my mouth, i am off to pub to drown it in tequila and 19 year olds, so in the morning i can add pregnancy and stds to my list of problems.
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