she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
Do vagina's smell?
there should be a national holiday dedicated to how high i am
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why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Over 50% of the drunkest nights I have ever had began with me saying "I'll just drink my dinner" to you.
Omg just opened my passenger side door and my outfit from last night is on the floorboard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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