At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
At best buy, little boy just crawled into my stall while i was taking a shit
Nothing is more important than the last pool party of the season. Call in sick or gay or something.
You kept showing everyone at the bar your bra to prove it matched your shoes.
One my way home. There was too much fog, strobe lights, and cocaine for my taste.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
Randomize
