I get so lonely sometimes I set my phone's alarm to go off every 5 minutes or so and imagine people are texting me.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
We made the bar tender tell us how he proposed to his girlfriend. In detail. While we made gushing noises. We are embarrassments to females everywhere
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Drunk Jeff aka Dreff thinks he's about 3x cooler than be really is and about 100x better at dancing than he really is
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
He stopped mid sex to say he was sorry that he couldn't make us work.continued. Stopped again to ask if it was crazy that he loved me.
That is not what no strings attached sex is about.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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