just rolled a joint with wrapping paper.. and you say i have no christmas spirit
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Would nail polish remover take gorilla glue off my nipples? We had a strange night.
Looks like a took a video of myself beating off and passed out last night. I'm classy.
I STILL HAVE A HARD TIME DECIDING WHAT TO WEAR IN THE MORNING HOW WOULD IT BE POSSIBLE FOR ME TO PICK A PAIR OF PANTS AND GO OH ILL JUST WEAR THESE FOR THE REST OF MY LIFE
I didn't even know this guy existed until he'd had his hands down my pants, so I just went with it.
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
We were so sore from having sex that we decided to fix it with more sex. It's the hair of the dog for sex hangover.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
How did I get up here...did jesus lift me up
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