Apparently mediocre decisions were made last night. I woke up alone in my own bed with my fridge defrosted.
And I didn't go to bed alone. I am buckets of fail.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
we used the bottom of a tampon for coke since no one had a 20 on them. My life has resisted to this.
Dude this stripper just dry humped the settings off my phone. She earned that dollar
Woke up with eyeliner streaked down my face, glitter all over my bed, and holding half-eaten Jimmy Johns. Plus, my whole family's downstairs for Thanksgiving... Welcome to the shitshow that is my early 20s
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
His name is Dustib. Not a typo. I just can't.
I offered him midol and told him "it always helps my period so maybe it'll help yours"
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
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