we have pet lesbian snakes
I totally have a Rabbi on speed dial now. Keep it Kosher.
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
i got pulled over in my 'cops love me' tshirt. he didn't think it was funny when i pointed it out.
i told her she would have to blow me everytime we lost a game of beer pong, she never noticed i purposely hit our opponents in the face every other shot
Did you really end last night's sexting with "Stay thirsty my friend"?
The trip involved octopus tentacles coming from the little holes in my TV's speakers. The beauty of the nonexistant symbolism had me in tears.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
I need an inhaler full of pot for all of this breathless rage.
I just watched an intern spill two trays of coffee inside a spinning door
Best exit from a building ever
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
Randomize