I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
I think I should have my paycheck direct deposited to the bar
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
there was a trail of blood coming out of one of the bathroom stalls. thought of you
Power hour was a bad idea. It turned into power 4 hours, then power puke. Then power sleep till 3.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Pagan metal show. There is a folk dance happening in the mosh pit. Also, I have no idea where we are.
Then his buddy called and said "my car broke down, I need a ride. If I'm not home by midnight they'll extend my house arrest." And I knew it was time to leave.
I don't trust my subconscious. It sleeps with my exboyfriend sometimes.
The logic in me says "don't text him" .But the vagina in me says "text him".
Randomize
