Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
I haven't worn deodorant in like three days and have been laying around in my underwear listening to music and drinking. I think i've made my own Bonnaroo in my apartment.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
At this point do you think buying mom a pot plant would be funny or highly inappropriate?
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
At least he uses his lack of impulse control for chaotic good instead of chaotic evil
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