with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
i used the pictures of vaginas in your biology book to jack off.
i told her that i loved her pillow breasts and then she asked me if i wanted to motor boat them. so yea, i do need the room tonite.
You have to stop getting hammered and preaching about that mission trip to Haiti.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
Fuck off I wasn't that drunk. I was still able to toss froot loops in the air and catch them in my mouth.
And in your bra. It was quite entertaining.
If I showed up at your door with pizza and a bottle of tequila wearing nothing but chaps and a fireman helmet, would you send me away?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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