You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
no. you can't hotbox the world.
The bong broke. we're having a little funeral followed by an inaugeration service for the new one
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
She dresses like Bruce Banner and fucks like the Hulk. She is all of my lesbian fantasies come true.
See if shell let you call her dr banner in bed
He left for work so I drank pickle juice from his fridge
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
with the way the semester is going, being a stripper is starting to sound better and better everyday
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
Anne is dead. totally passed out and was flat out in the street
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
