let's makeout let's makeout let's make out let's make out
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
I want to tell you about my weekend in person so I can see your look of judgement and disgust.
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I feel like tequila heightens the sense of my nipples.
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
When I was sick she came over with Call of Duty, animal crackers and a handjob. Honor says I can't dump her until Easter
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
The not so cute guy next to me made me play Kid Rock on the jukebox but I'm a big believer in free drinks so I obliged.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Randomize
